[Ec-ncuc] Fwd: [ NNSquad ] ICANN Announces Surprise Termination of Domain Name Expansion Program; Plans Own Dissolution

[Alex Gakuru]

hahaha!!! ;-) ;-) ;-)

On Sun, Apr 1, 2012 at 10:24 AM, Nuno Garcia <ngarcia at ngarcia.net> wrote:

> This is totally unexpected.
>
> BR
> NG
>
> ---------- Forwarded message ----------
> From: Lauren Weinstein <lauren at vortex.com>
> Date: 1 April 2012 08:05
> Subject: [ NNSquad ] ICANN Announces Surprise Termination of Domain Name
> Expansion Program; Plans Own Dissolution
> To: nnsquad at nnsquad.org
>
>
>
> ICANN Announces Surprise Termination of Domain Name Expansion Program;
> Plans Own Dissolution
>
> Sunday, 1 April 2012
>
> MARINA DEL REY, California (ZAP) -- In a stunning and unexpected
> announcement, the Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers
> (ICANN) has announced the immediate termination of its controversial and
> much criticized plan for a vast expansion of generic top-level
> Internet domain names (gTLDs), and has set an aggressive timetable for
> the dissolution of ICANN itself.
>
> ICANN has been increasingly condemned for what many observers have
> called erratic and inappropriate decision-making processes, leading to
> the U.S. Department of Commerce refusing to renew a key ICANN function
> last month, and ICANN's own outgoing CEO publicly implying that
> conflicts of interest on the ICANN board of directors have allowed
> ICANN to be co-opted by moneyed "domainer" speculation interests.
>
> ICANN spokesman Seymour Murdochian discussed his organization's
> drastic change of course as he snacked on Beluga caviar spread over
> Wonder Bread, while watching his Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow being
> washed and detailed in Beverly Hills.
>
> "I realize that there are many serious allegations outstanding against
> ICANN these days," said Mr. Murdochian.  "We're blamed for ignoring
> the best interests of the global Internet community.  We're accused of
> implementing an extortionist protection racket via an enormous domain
> name expansion program, that would ultimately suck billions of dollars
> out of the Internet economy and would only serve to enrich the
> "domain-industrial complex" operating those domains.  People claim
> that we arrogantly ignore legitimate concerns of trademark holders,
> are complicit in helping the U.S. government disable domains around
> the world without due process, waste money on unnecessary global
> travel to exotic locales, have become totally owned by a "gold rush"
> mentality via wealthy powers at the top of the DNS food chain, and
> even that we use overly expensive hand soap in our office restrooms,"
> added Mr. Murdochian.
>
> "I want to be absolutely clear that the ICANN board of directors takes
> firm and uncompromising exception to such a characterization.  Our
> hand soap is not outrageously expensive, and given the amount of hand
> washing we do around here, having quality soap available is a
> necessity, not a luxury," Murdochian noted.
>
> Murdochian then explained ICANN's recent change of heart.  "After
> extensive discussions internally, with our travel agents, and with our
> personal portfolio managers, we've decided that the time is ripe for
> us to bow out of formal Internet affairs.  We want to make way for the
> creation of new Internet governance models that can be purpose-built
> to better serve the entire Internet community around the world, will
> reduce the risk of Internet fragmentation that has been rising as
> domestic governments increasingly threaten not to play along with our
> current schemes, and will help reduce the risk of a potentially
> disastrous Internet takeover by politically-encumbered organizations
> such as the United Nations or International Telecommunication Union."
>
> "Therefore, we've announced that effective immediately, all ICANN
> activities related to new Internet top-level domains are permanently
> ended.  We will be refunding all associated fees already paid by
> applicants, and as a token of our appreciation for past support will
> be including with each refund an approximately 1.5 carat, 'H' color,
> 'SI' quality diamond from our vaults."
>
> "We have filed appropriate notifications with the Department of
> Commerce and foreign governments expressing our intention to cease all
> ICANN operations no later than a year from now on 1 April 2013."
>
> "I'll be reachable for additional comments at my summer home on the
> Riviera if there are any other questions," said Mr. Murdochian, just
> before his chauffeur whisked him away.
>
> Asked about these unexpected, dramatic developments, Lauren Weinstein,
> a long-time Internet technologist and vocal critic of ICANN's domain
> name plans, said that, "It's indeed encouraging to see ICANN finally
> doing what's really right for the entire global Internet community,
> and abandoning their plans to fleece the Internet at large for the
> benefit of domain speculators and associated opportunists.  A new
> alternative to ICANN and to existing organizations like the ITU and UN
> is definitely the way that we need to proceed to make the Internet
> better for everyone around the world.  It's a shame though that this
> process has taken so long, and that this entire article is only an
> April Fools' Day posting."
>
> ZAP/NYC 20120401 0916
>
> - - -
>
> --Lauren--
> Lauren Weinstein (lauren at vortex.com): http://www.vortex.com/lauren
> Co-Founder: People For Internet Responsibility: http://www.pfir.org
> Founder:
>  - Data Wisdom Explorers League: http://www.dwel.org
>  - Network Neutrality Squad: http://www.nnsquad.org
>  - Global Coalition for Transparent Internet Performance:
> http://www.gctip.org
>  - PRIVACY Forum: http://www.vortex.com
> Member: ACM Committee on Computers and Public Policy
> Lauren's Blog: http://lauren.vortex.com
> Google+: http://vortex.com/g+lauren / Twitter: http://vortex.com/t-lauren
> Tel: +1 (818) 225-2800 / Skype: vortex.com
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